Hesitation Stockings, Hestiation Shoes

Saturday, November 13, 2004

Contemplation

Went to the gym this morning. Minus 21, so it is much colder than yesterday. Did 600 calories on the eliptical machine. 88.2 kilos on the scale. Put a bit of ice on my left knee when I got home for the first time in a while, but not real bad.

I have many wine glasses in my cupboard. Don't need them, very rarely use them, but still there they are. Story behind some. Others I can't remember where they came from.

Yesterday I contacted S first when I saw her come on line. It wasn't that loneliness had defeated my resolve to not communicate for thirty days (deadline was Nov 24th), but rather I became worried that she might think I was, when we were both online at the same time, snubbing her ("cutting" as VS Naipaul might say). Brief chat, then I had to walk back to work.

I have written a letter with a proposal of marriage. For a friend of R's in Trinidad. She has a most beguiling figure, which she attempts to mostly conceal by dressing modestly, and I think she is very conventional and stable. She is 40 years old, never married. Anyway, no reason why she should be interested in a proposal of marriage from me, but there is no harm in making it and, of course, I do believe that a marriage with this women could be a good one.

I am alone a great deal of the time here in Yellowknife. But it doesn't seem to be making me as lonely as I feared it might. Wait, I suppose, for the literally dark days of December and January. Going to the office most days and dealing with the people there helps I'm sure.


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